Everyone knows people who believe that everything revolves around their desires and requirements. They act like the world owes them everything and tend to throw fits when things don’t go their way. They do not seem to follow the same standards themselves as they set for everybody else. These are the types of people who operate from an entitlement mentality. Understanding how to deal with people like this effectively is crucial, or else your life could be disrupted quickly and inexplicably. In a sense, sometimes, we all have this to a degree.
One of my favourite tweet in fact it’s my pinned tweet was a statement made by Jordan Peterson.
Self-love is the only antidote to the chaos of existence. And if you don’t love and care for yourself and your own needs, you will cause unnecessary suffering for:
— ReelNat (@reel_nat) May 28, 2023
1 – Yourself
2 – Those you care about
3 – and those that care about you
– Jordan Peterson
What is the Entitlement Mentality?
An entitlement mentality is a belief that you are owed something and do not need to put in a lot or even any effort to get it. In a way, it is a familiar feeling to some extent. For instance, it’s normal for us to expect people to treat us like we are intellectual and have a heart, but that expectation does not always result in us receiving what we would like. Well-adjusted adults understand this and can manage disappointments that may occur.
A person who has an entitlement mentality expects to be treated as if they are superior to others. They judge others as if they are less and exist solely to serve them.
The feeling of entitlement is a trait of personality that stems from the belief that they deserve privileges or recognition for things they have not earned. Simply put, people with this belief believe the world owes them something for nothing.
Healthy Sense of Entitlement
The idea of requesting anyone to assist you in a way you can’t make or do yourself is normal. It doesn’t make you self-entitled. Examples include:
- A feeling of security in an intimate relationship
- Demanding love
- The reciprocity of feelings and appreciation
Certain people, mainly females, have been taught to believe their desires and needs are somehow unjust. They are generous but scared to request the most basic of needs. They are at risk of being victimized in every way since they are scared to not say NO. They feel they don’t deserve safety, love, or joy, but know this: the expectation of certain things is good for your health.
The most important thing is that you do not automatically assume that the universe is going to give you these things. It’s also crucial to realize that these are things that everyone ought to have, not only you, and that you are ready to offer others what you want.
Signs that You or Someone Has an Entitlement Mentality
Someone with an entitlement mentality may have extreme confidence in themselves or the belief that they should gain from every circumstance.
If someone who has an ego-driven view does not receive what they want, it is not uncommon for them to lash out at people with frustration or anger. Their mood fluctuates frequently and is particularly pronounced when things don’t go their way.
The reason for these behaviors is usually the conviction that they deserve to be loved and respected; even though they appear to have a bold personality or impressive self-confidence; many people with an attitude of entitlement struggle with insecurities. The way they seek attention can lead to isolation from their loved ones. This can result in feelings of loneliness and depression.
What are the indicators of an entitlement mentality? If you need clarification on whether someone you know has an entitlement mentality, look at these characteristics and decide whether they are applicable.
They believe they are entitled to some sort of special treatment.
People who feel entitled believe they deserve to enjoy preferential treatment and special benefits without considering why they should be treated with special care. They believe that the world owes them.
Do not like hearing NO.
You’ve probably met someone who lashes out when they are told No. They’ll try intimidation, threats, tantrums, or any other tactic when they are told No for any reason. Manipulation is one of their most powerful traits.
They believe that everyone should attend to them.
They believe that everyone should take care of them due to their person or the amount of money or power they possess. If they’ve reached some level of success, they believe everyone must bend to assist them.
If someone is unhappy with them or does not believe in what they’re doing, they’ll try to make the opposing party think that they’re wrong and that it’s wrong not to agree with them.
They believe that they are entitled to more than they have in their lives.
No matter what they have, they believe they deserve more. They want to make their lives more luxurious than other people without the work required to achieve it.
They are not grateful for what they have in their lives.
People who feel entitled might not thank you or show other indications of appreciation for the things you’ve given to them. It is because they think they can possess everything they want, which is why they don’t appreciate it.
Their personal needs come before everyone else’s.
If you require something, do not expect them to quit what they’re doing and assist you. They believe it’s your job to ensure they are stocked with everything they require, even if it means that you’re unable to manage your obligations.
When someone doesn’t give in to their demands, they will cause a major fuss.
They can be extremely dramatic when things don’t go their way. If a family member or friend is like this and you are aware of it, it is recommended to avoid them whenever it happens. In the event that they do, they’ll attempt to appear better by making you look bad.
They constantly need praise and admiration from others.
A sense of entitlement is associated with Narcissism. People just thinking about themselves and their happiness might be extremely demanding of attention and praise from others.
They feel an entitlement toward possessions, money, or friends.
Anyone who behaves in this manner about a particular thing is more likely to behave similarly about many things. They might be greedy and ungrateful.
Victimize and blame other people or external forces for their issues.
If a person in your life frequently feels like something bad happens to them constantly, they likely feel entitled. People who believe this view think that the world and others are accountable for improving their lives.
Love Pity Parties.
Did someone lash out and disagree with them? You could be hearing about it for a long time—for months.
They will belittle others if they don’t get their way.
The entitled person will try to tear you down verbally and make you feel guilty for not giving in to their demands. They’ll call you names or make a fuss about you to anyone who listens and tell you that you’re not worth anything if you refuse to accept their demands.
Will sabotage the success of another in order to win.
Entitled people are not afraid of sabotage when going to the top. The person must be the winner at all costs and believe that every means is fair game as long as it leads them to where they want to be.
They are secretly struggling with anxiety.
A person with an entitlement attitude might appear confident or arrogant; it could be a disguise for the underlying worry about not having enough respect or resources. Insecurity and fear may also be a sign of depression and self-isolation.
What Causes Entitlement Mentality?
It’s not entirely clear what triggers each case in entitlement. However, it’s widely believed that the root cause is typically one of these factors.
The environment you grew up in
Our surroundings can foster an entitlement mindset, in which people are conditioned to feel an entitlement or expectation of privileges and rewards without considering the related responsibilities or effort. In a world of overindulgence and a lack of accountability with a constant need for validation, people might believe that they’re entitled to certain benefits and treatment simply by being alive. This attitude can hinder personal development, empathy, and resiliency, ultimately hindering the ability of individuals to face obstacles and contribute positively to society.
Getting everything you wanted as a child.
Children who are not told NO or who are surrounded by parents who give in to any request grow up believing that’s how the world operates. Children learn that they’ll get any and everything they want if they make enough manipulation or fuss.
Not getting everything you wanted as a child.
The portion of people with this kind of personality believes that since they could not receive the things they needed as kids, they should be able to have them now as adults without earning them for themselves.
How authority figures treat you
The treatment by authority figures can lead to an attitude of entitlement. Suppose people are consistently given preferential treatment, praised in excess, or protected from consequences; In that case, these people can be conditioned to expect certain privileges and treatment that can create a sense of entitlement. This may make it difficult for them to recognize and respect boundaries, accept feedback or criticism, and appreciate that accountability is important. An entitlement mindset hinders personal development, erodes empathy, and creates unhealthy relations with authoritative figures and colleagues.
Mental illness.
It is a characteristic of narcissistic personality disorder. While not all individuals who are entitled are narcissistic, most people with narcissistic personality disorders are prone to feeling entitled. Whatever the reason for the behavior, those with entitlement personality traits can be difficult to manage.
Overcoming The Entitlement Mentality
You can shift your perspective if you feel you have an entitlement mentality. Learning to be grateful and humble can make you more accountable and compassionate. If you’re looking to break free from the entitlement mindset and develop new ways of living to become more self-sufficient. Begin by following the tips below.
Recognize your entitlement.
Do not let it affect your life. If you’re having difficulty recognizing the emotion, consider the times you felt entitled, and note how this feeling is similar to how you’re feeling right now.
Act As If The World Owes You Nothing.
Know that you’re not entitled to anything. The world doesn’t owe you anything. Life isn’t fair, and it’s your responsibility to make the most of what you’ve got. The sooner we realize that nobody is owed any obligation, the better for us and the better equipped we are to take on life’s challenges. We will live with the highest level of accountability by constantly reminding ourselves that no one owes us any obligation.
Don’t nourish it.
Even if you can offer the entitled person what they want, make sure that it’s something you don’t mind doing; Be prepared to tell them NO If it’s an inconvenience.
Offer a hand-up and not a handout.
Consider if doing what they want can actually aid them in learning how to take care of themselves. Imagine that your brother or sister has lost their job and home and asks you to let them remain with you. You don’t want them begging on the streets. Therefore, you agree. However, don’t stop there. Give them a deadline and set of goals about how you’d like them to progress towards becoming independent. Let them know you aren’t doing their laundry, letting them live there indefinitely, or without them contributing in some way, even if it’s helping with the chores.
Practice assertiveness.
Be ready to tell them No and then stick to the decision. Don’t give in and let yourself be manipulated. You deserve fair treatment, and it’s up to you to let it be known.
An entitled person doesn’t mind how much you’ve given up or how irritable you may be so long as they can get what they want.
Find ways to assist others without expectation of anything in return.
How can you help others with no expectation of any reward? Simple: volunteer your time. If you’re hoping to get something in exchange for your efforts, consider the benefits you’ll get in return; happiness from knowing that you’ve assisted those less fortunate than you.
The golden rule.
Treat people the way you would want to be treated. Whatever your social standing, be kind and respectful when interacting with people. Be gentle with others. Be sensitive to their needs.
Recognize that not all situations are unfair.
If you’re caught in a situation that you believe is unfair, take an instant and consider the bigger picture. Is it fair that you have to automatically get a better grade since you paid for tuition earlier than most? Imagine how the world would look if that was the rule.
Learn the difference between wants and needs.
People who feel entitlement are unable to differentiate between wants and needs. This makes it extremely difficult to make wise decisions as you continually seek more than you should. Instead, think about the things you need in life and cut out what you would only like to have until you can afford it yourself.
Focus on what’s in your control rather than what isn’t.
You are the only one who can control your thoughts, emotions, actions, and reactions. Don’t be distracted by the actions of others or the way they respond to events. Instead, you should focus on transforming the things you are able to influence within your life.
Be aware of your entitlement and how it affects others in your life. Have other people experienced the effects of your notion of entitlement? Have you inadvertently made people feel resentful or guilty due to the fact that they did not live according to your expectations? If yes, keep in mind that everyone else has their own lives to live and their own feelings and opinions.
Take care of yourself and be kind to yourself because nobody else will do it for you.
It may sound counterintuitive; however, one method to eliminate the entitlement mentality is to be kind to yourself. If you feel entitled to be treated as a superior, sometimes meeting your requirements could be challenging or impossible. Ultimately, you may get into a position of self-neglect because you’re looking for someone else to look after your needs.
Refrain from arguing.
Arguments are a method by which the entitled person attempts to intimidate others. Refrain from arguing and then leave. The silent treatment is the one issue that most entitled people cannot handle well.
Call them out with respect.
Be calm and say that you think the request is unjust and that you do not like being spoken to in the manner that the person is talking to you. Tell them there are your personal concerns to think about and that they’re wrong in assuming that others will do what they are doing. Some people truly don’t understand how they are coming across.
Use wish-fulfillment statements.
This can be used in all kinds of situations. Speak calmly; I wish I could accomplish what you’re asking, But I’m unable to because. Let me assist you in figuring out how you can complete the task. A good illustration of this is the student who has failed an exam and wants a second chance. You could say, I wish I could offer you a second chance, but that isn’t fair to other students and is against my policy. Let’s look at what we can do to help you succeed on your next exam.
Believe That You Are Your Own Rescue.
Be sure to hear this loud and clear; There is no one coming to save you! You are the one who comes to your rescue! Barrack Obama once stated: “Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” It is your responsibility to own your future. Stop acting in the same manner and in a way that others will see you as a burden.
Be accountable for the present situation and develop a plan to get where you would like to be. Make a conscious decision about the steps you’ll have to take to get to where you would like to be. Instead of searching for anchors beyond your control, take steps. You are the one who can save you!
Be Grateful.
Steven Furtick said: “Gratitude begins where my sense of entitlement ends.” A person who feels entitled isn’t likely to say thank you or show other indications of gratitude for what they have been given. Brene Brown once said: “What separates privilege from entitlement is gratitude.” We must learn to do more of giving thanks for what we have instead of being envious of the things we don’t have. Think about everything you currently have in your life, such as a house, family, or friends, a healthy body, etc.
Read More: How Well Do You Handle Correction?
Read More: Signs You or Someone Might Be Playing the Victim and How to Deal with It
Read More: Breaking Prejudice and Discrimination: Unveiling the Hidden Impact and Overcoming Barriers
Entitlement Quotes About Life
- “Entitlement corrupt.” – James Stockdale
- “The only entitlement guaranteed should be the fruits of one’s own labor.” Michael Palmer
- “When there’s expectation, without appreciation, you get entitled and ingratitude.” — Cheri Fogarty
- “Don’t think that the world owes you anything. The world doesn’t owe you anything. It was here first.” Mark Twain
- “Service and gratitude will fuel your relationship; entitlement and expectation will poison you.” Dr. Steve Maraboli
- “Nothing guarantees more the erosion of character than getting something for nothing.” Dennis Prager
- “Entitlement? How can you be entitled to someone else’s money?” – John Stossel
- “Success is not an entitlement. It has to be earned.” Howard Schultz
- “The bigger the sense of entitlement, the smaller the sense of gratitude.” John Ortberg
- “Teach your children gratefulness. Do all you can to deliver them from our culture’s poisonous entitlement mentality.” – Randy Alcorn
- “You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.” – Harlan Ellison.
- “Good results is not an entitlement. It has to be earned and earned each individual working day via the lens of humility.” – Howard Schultz.
Conclusion
Be aware that making any change isn’t an easy task. However, it’s going to be worthwhile. If you’re struggling to navigate these changes on your own, think about consulting an expert in mental health to provide assistance.
They can help you identify the root of problems that led to feelings of entitlement. It is important to realize that seeking out help from a counselor or therapist isn’t a sign that you’re weak. Instead, it’s a signal that you’ve realized there’s the need to make changes, and you’re looking to improve your life or relations with others. As time passes, you will learn very well ways to deal with issues of entitlement and learn how to live a balanced and healthy life.
